After 10 years of living in Sweden I still don’t know what to make of the Systembolaget. Is it really the evil ‘Beer Brother’ that many of us make it out to be or is it in fact your ultimate drinking buddy – reliable and always there when you need it (as long as that’s within opening hours of course) with a great selection of beers to offer you?

One thing I do know. Not only does the Systembolaget bring some fantastic beers into Sweden it also stops a lot of downright weird beers from ever reaching these shores.

Here’s three bizarre beers that you shouldn’t expect to see on a Systembolaget shelf near you anytime soon:

1)Bilk

I suppose judging by their weirdo game shows the Japanese can be a little bit ‘eccentric’ but they’ve reached a whole new level of odd by combining beer and milk to create Bilk – a supposedly sweet tasting drink that’s proving big in Japan.

The idea behind the beer came from the Japanese dairy industry which had a huge surplus of milk and didn’t know what to do with it. Of course the obvious thing was to create a beer – with one-third of Bilk made up of cow’s milk.

(トイレ/薬局) はどこですか？ (that’s ‘where is the bathroom” in Japanese).

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2) Kwispelbier

Now I don’t know who was smoking what over in The Netherlands but the inventor of Kwispelbier – a beer for dogs – is clearly barking mad.

The beer is made from beef extract, comes with its own ‘Belgium-style’ chalice glass and contains absolutely no alcohol – so there’s no chance of getting your pooch pissed.

Want to learn more. Check out the video here!

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3) KidsBeer

I wonder if it’s possible to count the number of Swedish laws that would be broken should Kidsbeer (a non-alcoholic beverage for children that apparently looks like the real thing) was to ever find its way over here?

I can already picture the queue of shocked Swedish government ministers lining up for interviews to condemn this drink, which looks and foams like a beer but tastes like cola.

And as if that wasn’t bad enough check out Kidsbeer’s catchy slogan:

”Even kids cannot stand life unless they have a drink.”

Now I understand why there are only two beers from Japan currently available at the Systembolaget. Perhaps the monopoly isn’t that bad after all……………………..